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Monsters in the mind. Modern psychology would have them exorcized with a pill, artists exercise them into works of art.

#art #RandomThoughts

This nightmare banishing dream pillow was pretty much built “on the run” while chatting with a friend of mine who had been suffering from terrible nightmares for a few nights, leading up to her waking up screaming and feeling like she couldn't breath. After listening her needs, this is what I wrote for her:

Materials

• Black cloth. (Here, black is used to denote strength, protection, calmness, darkness). Natural fibres are best, not only because the pillow will be rather close to your head. Cotton is a good choice.
• Sewing equipment, either plain old thread and needle or machine
• Embroidery threads or fabric pain
  • Herbs

Starting Out

The dream pillow has “two layers”. The inner one will be the pillow itself, with the herbs. The outer one is the “pillow case” for this inner pillow.

To begin with, you'll need to choose symbols that will be embroidered or painted on the outer pillow, the pillow case, as well as colours for the symbols. The symbols should denote Strength and Protection, the symbols used and their colours should arise from your own personal symbology and correspondences – they should speak to you. You can add other symbols according to your own needs and insights.

The pillow's final size should be 11” x 11cm. This strange mixture of measurement units is because the idea is to use the number 11. Here, 11 denotes both the pentagram and the hexagram, it's the number of the Goddess and also refers to one's Great Work. The purpose is to banish disturbing nightmares and these nightmares can indeed interfere with one's Great Work, especially when they're making you too tired to Live.

Cut four pieces of the fabric, large enough for you to be able to get that 11” x 11cm pillow from. Put two of the pieces aside for a while and start working with the other two – the pillow case.

Embroider or paint the symbols you chose with your chosen colours on both of the pieces (right side of the fabric). If you painted the symbols, let the paint dry out completely before starting to sew and if you're using fabric paints, iron the paint as per instructions. Then, sew the pieces together with the right sides in. Leave the other 'short end' unsewed. This is where you will slip the the inner pillow inside the pillowcase. Turn the allowances on this short end in and sew in place. You can attach ribbons to the sides of the opening in order to tie it and keep the inner pillow in place. You can also sew the opening close when the pillow is ready, but ribbons make it much easier to change the inner pillow if needed.

The next step is sewing the inner pillow. Make it a little bit smaller than the pillow case. Sew the sides, right sides of the fabric in, leaving a couple of inches on one side for turning the pillow seams in and then stuffing it. Turn the seams in.

The Herbs

For this nightmare banishing pillow, I chose the following herbs for choosing from: Lavendar, mugwort, hyacinth flowers, anise, cedar, rosemary, valerian, hops, marjoram, dittany of Greece, garlic, thyme ... Do take your allergies into consideration and don't use anything that might trigger your allergies!

Use approximately 50% lavender, with a dash of rosemary and anise. With others, make a nice and even blend. Remember, you should be able to sleep on that pillow! Mix the herbs gently, without using iron / metal bowls or servers.

It is better not to use: Sage, as it may cause haunting feelings in your dream. Tansy, as it can cause nightmares. Other species of Artemisia than the above-mentioned mugwort, or laurel, as they can cause dreams with fears. You might want to remove these from your sleeping quarters as well. Use the herbs as herbs, not as oils. While some instructions do mention oils in dream pillows, oils can have too strong a scent and they may stain.

Fill the inner pillow. It is supposed to be rather flat, not round. Sew the hole you left for filling and put the inner pillow inside the pillowcase you made earlier. Tie the ribbons or sew the pillowcase shut.

Other Notes

While preparing the pillow, concentrate your thoughts on what the pillow is meant to do. That is, the whole preparing process is good old fashioned Witchcraft and the pillow itself a kind of spell wrapped in cloth :–)

Then to Banish the Nightmares

You're not supposed to just lay your head to sleep after making the pillow. You should be preparing yourself for the forthcoming night, sleeping and dreaming. Before falling asleep, perform a banishing ritual of the type you are most familiar with. The purpose of this is to sleep inside a 'circle', within cleansed space.

If you can, perform the ritual in your mind instead of going around or on your bed. That is, your mind is doing all the necessary work, while your body is resting on the bed.

Include the whole of your bed and a little bit of its surroundings to the area you are cleansing. If your bed is next to a wall, pull it out a little bit so that there's some space between the wall and the bed. Otherwise you might be taking a little bit of your next door neighbour's apartment inside your circle.

After the banishing, relax your whole body and – sweet dreams!

#magick #spell #pagan

Over an extended period of introspection, I have come to recognize that my aptitude for producing large-scale artworks is, in reality, far more limited than I had long presumed. While I am able to navigate the demands of a canvas comparable in scale to my sketchbook, works exceeding those dimensions present an overwhelming challenge and consume a disproportionate amount of time and cognitive resources. This difficulty is compounded by the limitations of my current living situation in a densely packed apartment building with inadequate insulation, requiring additional protective measures for my physical artwork that go well beyond the initially straightforward act of encasing them in plastic. Therefore, my artwork MUST not exceed 8.5 by 11 inches. Furthermore, I'm diverse but also quite limited to what I can work with, ranging from high-quality acrylic paints to more elementary mediums such as Crayola crayons, all of which necessitate the application of Mod Podge spray for preservation.

Given these factors, I have opted to concentrate my traditional artistic practice on miniature works. This not only aligns better with my environmental and material constraints but also because I find it easier to do than having 5 larger pieces and leaving them unfinished, often due to uncertainty about their direction or the need for specific materials that I can't afford or are hard to find. My prior explorations in various techniques and genres, including printmaking, T-shirt design, and thematic series centered on cakes, failed to yield artistic or personal satisfaction. The processes inherent to these undertakings proved either excessively complex or revealed my own limitations with conceptual and serialized art-making. In contrast, the execution of miniature pieces provides a directness and manageability absent from more elaborate forms. It's also why I like cartooning and abstract art (to some degree) more.

Everything in art is too unnecessarily complex for me, a realization that at one point catalyzed a hiatus spanning two years from any serious engagement with art. The pursuit of a professional trajectory in art, with its attendant pressures and systemic frustrations, has not abated even as I attempt to chart an independent path outside conventional academic frameworks – eschewing both formal fine arts degrees and so-called “online self-directed learning” curricula that requires payment. In retrospect, I derive greater fulfillment from exploration that is entirely self-directed by me, than from passive reception of knowledge in classroom settings. Frankly, I don't feel good being taught by someone else anymore. I just don't. I understand its importance, but I don't feel good about education anymore. I would rather educate myself whenever I feel it's necessary to.

Honestly, it's more about people than it is about education. Teachers and professors don't know how to handle anyone with empathy and understanding anymore. My encounters with teachers and professors have revealed a pervasive deficit in empathy and understanding, with many resorting to condescension toward those they deem obstinate, and at times, characterizing their own students as deliberately obtuse or illiterate. Such attitudes have eroded my inclination to reengage with formal education, undermining not only my motivation to improve, but also my trust in the capacity of educators to support diverse learners. With rare exception, my teachers have failed to demonstrate the patience and flexibility necessary to nurture students facing unique challenges, reinforcing my conclusion that the problem is institutional and systemic.

Consequently, I have resolved to assume full autonomy over my artistic development, determining for myself the parameters of my progress and the criteria by which it is measured. While I remain receptive to criticism in principle, I am acutely sensitive to prescriptive feedback, regardless of its rationale – a trait present since childhood, and not indicative of rebellion but rather heightened emotional receptivity to anything that could be interpreted as controlling. My objective, henceforth, is to dedicate my creative efforts to smaller-scale works, prioritizing professionalism over spectacle, and ensuring that my art remains a source of personal accomplishment rather than external validation.

I've been saying, “I'm not doing well enough to get better,” all year. I've said it to my sister & I've said it to my boyfriend. They're not doing well enough to help me.

I want to address the way I talk. Someone in the Scribes&Makers group on Mastodon said not too long ago that I had a positive energy that inspires others. And another stranger who found my twitch stream said they thought I was a great person. I am willing to accept compliments if others are willing to tolerate honesty. Yesterday was my sister's birthday and I did not contact her. I knew it was her birthday but at some point it fell out of my mind. My attention is almost entirely distracted by chronic pain & the things I do to avoid chronic pain. I don't have good days, I get some scattered good half hours. I don't like complaining but I do like honesty. I'm also annoyed at how long it takes to say anything. I've already raised so many topics.

The theme is my sunny pessimism. The theme is people who find inspiration in me while I'm painfully aware of my negative outlook. Take what I just put on Instagram:

It's easy for me to imagine my words provoking disapproval. Of the things I've shared so far the following could be fairly seen as unacceptable negativity: assessing my capabilities as lacking; assessing my sister's & my boyfriend's capabilities as lacking (how do I even know?! & it's an improper thing to say!); pessimism & passive aggression in the Instagram posts. Negativity isn't tolerated, especially negativity from a creative wishing for recognition & income, especially especially on corpo social media! Sigh. Look, I've already admitted this post isn't what I want to be writing. I want to say all these things much quicker, for my sake & yours (if there are any you). Ok. It's things like that! I know it's “bad form” to question the existence of an audience. One, someone has to read it to read it! Two, I'm not owed an audience, I'm not owed art sales. When I say these things, about trashing paintings or no one reading, I know I sound bitter & there's no way that I'm not — but also I'm not. Or at least I'm not angry. I see myself as fortunate in many ways.

Break from writing during which I slept and lived a day I did not enjoy much. I also texted my sister.

The honesty is that I feel it's important to flatly describe how I am doing. I am not doing well. Saying so bluntly causes reactions from others. The reactions usually do not help, usually make me feel that it would be better if I were not honesty about feeling bad. What I've just described may be the disabled person's dilemma. I do not expect anyone to solve my problems. Yes they are debilitating. Pretending that things are great is an additional burden I do not wish to bear. So I barely socialize, barely talk to anyone.

When I say that no one can solve my problems, when I say that my sister and boyfriend are not doing well enough to help me, what I mean is that managing my current difficulties would require a full-time commitment. No one I know, even those who might care deeply about me, is in a position to manage my life and theirs too. It would require someone “doing so well” that their own lives are running smoothly nearly on auto-pilot, such that they could drop everything to help me out. I have some big tasks. I do not expect to be able to do them well. I have to accept that.

I do sometimes receive offers of financial sponsorship of medical procedures. I do not have the energy tonight to explain why that is not as appealing as it sounds. Well, yes I do! I don't want to put it off. As I just indicated, my current abilities / energy level is such that I can barely think and make decisions, and I'm only motivated and functioning for a half hour or so here & there. Selecting a new doctor, initiating any new treatment is beyond me. And it seems like it would be the beginning of a multi-month or multi-year process & that is definitely beyond my current capacity. I have a hard financial deadline for moving out of my current home that is fast approaching. I feel like that is where my limited focus must be. I know in theory that medical treatment should help increase my functioning — but that just has not been my experience ever. Every medical relationship I've ever attempted has been long, complicated, expensive, disappointing, psychologically draining. What I think for now is that I need to receive some minimum maintenance medical care (a prescription I know works ok, in the dosage I require) while I work to start a new phase of my life.

Perhaps I'll feel differently if I felt a little bit better. But as for now, I am not doing well enough to get better.

I can’t function one of the reasons i want to move, the reason i want to move is that I can’t function as things are. but i have to function in order to move. no one is available to help at the level that I really need. i came home motivated to move with the idea of doing the minimum things to get out: specifically putting aside the things I want to keep. even this attitude {minimum gathering of things i want} seems to be more than i can accomplish. there’s so much stuff and i am alone. others have their own motivations. no one is available to help me transition to new phase of life. not the practical stuff i have to do. i feel that i have to accept doing a poor job just to focus on escape from current situation. i have to accept that things won’t go to the friends & family that I would like. i have to accept that i will not enter my next phase with most of the things i will want. i feel that i have to accept losing most paintings.

---

Previously: January 7 I'm not doing well enough to get better

#ScribesAndMakers 8 April: Share a song lyric that resonates with you.

Like a lot of these prompts, a simple question can be a tough question. Lately I'm not listening to music very often. I go through phases it seems. And when I do I often don't even know the lyrics; I'm drawn to the sound of it. Like I love to sing along to the following in French to stretch my mouth: Eartha Kitt singing Je Cherche Un Homme & Françoise Hardy roaring Je N'Attends Plus Personne. Even though I like the words in those I can't really say that the lyrics resonate. If I were going to select a favorite Eartha Kitt song with lyrics I embrace it would be Lazy Afternoon, a short (2:22) song about appreciating nature languorously with a lover. Does that resonate? Yeah I love being able to do nothing in nature. But it's another love song & I don't want to imply that someone else is required to enjoy a lazy afternoon.

Am I overthinking? What some call a hashtag game I call an opportunity for reflection. I re-listened to my Frank Ocean favorites. “Why see the world when you've got the beach?” (Sweet Life) I listen to Frank for the melodies more than lyrics. Or tbh I am always conscious of his role as a closeted-then-out gay hip hop star when I listen to Frank Ocean. What lyrics resonate with my life experience? In music I'm often drawn to mixing meaning and nonsense, in songs by Bowie, Prince, REM, Talking Heads, Negativland, & They Might Be Giants.

Then I remembered a snip from a They Might Be Giants' song I don't even love. Towards the end of XTC vs Adam Ant is a repeating line that has resonated with me for years, “There is no right or wrong.” I'm simple, I guess, to take a single line from a song here & there to build my philosophy around. As an atheistic humanist I've not had hymns to buoy me. I take inspiration wherever. There's a Scissor Sister's song, Everybody Wants The Same Thing & I used to sing those words when I was frustrated in traffic—like if there's six lanes & all the cars are backed up in one, because the majority are taking the same general path. That five word title—no matter any other lyrics in the song—helps me accept the frustrations of large group dynamics. Deep down it even hits me in the same way as the obvious message of Sting's Cold War ditty Russians. We all want the same things, to love & be loved—to drive home safely after work. Singing, “Everybody Wants The Same Thing,” helps me love others whom I do not know personally. And that helps me let go of frustrations.

There is no right or wrong is a guiding principle for me, somehow, despite me having strong ethics and values. Explaining my philosophy is a long term goal, possible writing project, more than I can make clear today. I'm attaching notes below.

While rediscovering music that resonates I found an old note in which I was brainstorming what I might say in abstract art classes. I had an idea—when I thought that Covid would end with near-universal vaccinations and continued attention to public health—that I would lead “abstract art experience” classes in my home for small groups. These would be opportunities for “normies” to express their creativity in a space of encouragement, where I would discuss the spiritual aspects of my art practice. The song XTC vs Adam Ant was to be a musical cue. Below are those notes. Apologies that they are not edited to be clear!



XTC vs Adam Ant would cue me to end of a free painting session. Add song twice so that we can listen to lyrics on second play. “Please continue to work, but I’m going to pause. I use this song as my cue to start talking again, about right and wrong decisions. This song is XTC vs. Adam Ant by They Might Be Giants. I have no idea why they would want to sing this about these two bands, but they themselves are musicians and I’m sure have a lot of weird thoughts about success in the music industry. Ultimately the song is absurd, if you listen to it, as many They Might Be Giants songs are. I’ve always really liked them somehow. They can inspire me to think deep thoughts while they sing what seems like nonsense. What I most appreciate about this song is when they repeat, There is no right or wrong…
Not every decision will have a right or wrong answer, and I for one need that reminder. So I’m so very glad to have this catchy refrain that I can turn to whenever I want. What about—feeling tense, tension in the body JUST DUE TO or JUST FROM or JUST WHILE typing into the phone and not getting it to work? This happened now while I'm typing but it's an opportunity to talk about how small tech frustrations can feel debilitating. OR OPENING PLASTIC PACKAGING! The Stress—what stress!—over such a small act. That’s why I so value my abstract practice of actions large and small none of which are subject to right / wrong judgments. Only instead of right/wrong I ask myself, do I like this, do I want to keep it or change it? How do I feel? For now in this moment that’s all that matters. I just dripped some separated whey that fell off the spoon as I was serving myself yogurt No that’s not what happened lol I stirred the whey back into the yogurt first in order to not deal with separated liquid whey AND the act of my stirring pushed some amount of the liquid whey against the side of the container causing a drop to fly out onto the counter. And it feels wrong. I messed up. I “made a mess” , gave myself more work to do, etc. And so what?! On the good news side today I discovered a new favorite spoon to use to eat yogurt because I accidentally used the “wrong” one.

These examples from my life show the harm and stress I might eperience thousands of times a day worrying about doing things right or wrong. I think I store it in my body pains, honestly. Repetition of so many little choices per day impairs efficient functioning and my health, physically and mentally, small and large. To go from little things to big ones, just trying to make it through life I’ve probably wondered thousands if not millions of times: Am I a good person? 
We feel we want to or need to think of ourselves that way. 
And I think that’s a harmful trap. 
I now believe FEELING GOOD is my goal in life NOT BEING GOOD. What’s the difference? It’s tied to the difference between doing and being. As self-referential as it is, I think feeling is more an action verb than being. Feeling is perceiving; being is just… being. We are not ever really going to know, to be able to judge ourselves once and for all as either good or bad. We just aren’t. Life is ongoing. So I cannot ever stop and say, I did it. I /AM/ good. I made it, I’m a good person now! (Or, always have been; or always will be, no matter what.) That label is useless to me, and as I’m saying I think worrying about it causes harm. Switch from being fo feeling. I /FEEL/ GOOD when I’m productive, when I’m creative, when I contribute to others. While BEING seems to be an equals sign between me and good, for me to eternally question in a binary way, am I or not? FEELING has degrees. Feeling is an action more than a state. It leads me to think about what I can do, what I will do to feel as good as I can. This realization has been transformative for me. I still have to fight not to fall into the old ways of thinking that have been so ingrained in me and can be so prevalent. But I feel empowered knowing that I can change my point of view by changing the questions I ask myself, from Am I Good? to Am I Feeling Good—and if not, what can I do to help me feel better? I experience a strong link between feeling good and doing good; and I think that if there is any real measure of being good it comes out of doing good. I just don’t think it’s ever possible to have enough perspective to say I AM GOOD. So I work to push that question aside and try to do good and feel good. There’s so much more here but this is intended to be an art experience with forays into philosophy. Just know that all of this thinking is very linked to why I make abstract expressionist paintings. 

THIS COULD BE THE END.

(note: Blog* = the untilted dot lol blog at this website)

I have implemented a kind of experimental code for my new blog. This code defines a multifunctional sidebar interface combined with blog post navigation, a popup message system (that people can optionally click), and my attempt at dynamic RSS JSON feed generation. Below, I explain every line and component to highlight how the code works and its technical structure.

mySidebar

The sidebar is represented by the <nav> element. It is positioned to remain fixed on the left side of the page, occupying the full height. Here I will explain its inline CSS styles (I use inline CSS for everything because it's easier to keep track of which CSS styles are linked to a specific HTML div):

• z-index:3: Since nav is positioned to be fixed, the z-index property is used to ensure that the sidebar appears above most page elements but below higher-priority components like the popup (For context, the popup's z-index is 5).
• width:320px, height:100%: These physical dimensions are appropriate for sidebars and for both mobile and desktop users.
• position:fixed, top:0, left:0: Fixes the sidebar at the top-left corner of the viewport.
• background-color:white: Sets the sidebar's background color for better readability.
• overflow:auto: Enables scrolling if the content inside the sidebar exceeds the sidebar height.
• border-right:1px solid #ddd, box-shadow: Adds a subtle shadow and lining for visual separation.

The reason for the id="mySidebar" identifier is to allow JavaScript functions to interact with this element dynamically.

What's Inside The <nav>?

You will note that most everything is in block format which means that block elements stack on top of each other.

1. <div id="makespaceforbutton">:

   • Acts as an empty container for any potential dynamic content placed via JavaScript and also to, as the id obviously puts it, “make space for button”. There is a border-bottom:1px solid #ddd line, the space between the content and the border is about 35px (padding), and all text is aligned center for consistency.

2. <a id="aboutLink"> and its styles:

   • Serves as a navigational link titled “About This Blog.”
   • Attributes: href="javascript:void(0) prevents default link navigation, instead relying on onclick="showAboutPopup()" to show the “About This Blog” popup.
   • Styling (background-color: #616161, color:white, etc.) gives a greyish background with white text and ensures a user-friendly, visually distinct appearance.

3. Posts Section Toggle (<a id="postsBtn">):

   • Exists to enable the visibility of the list of available posts as a clickable button. This is managed via the onclick="togglePosts()" handler. All other styles it contains is for aesthetic purposes.

Posts Section

<div id="Demo1"> shows a list of collapsible posts, initially hidden as display:none. It contains individual post links structured as (example):

<a ... onclick="showPost('Post1')">
  <div>
    <span>POST1</span>
    <p>insertdatehere</p>
  </div>
</a>

These links include:

• Dynamic IDs and Styling: Each link is styled for clean layout with borders (border-bottom:1px solid #ddd) and 16px padding.
• Functions for Content Display: The onclick event attribute calls showPost(), a function that takes an argument (in this case, the ID of the post to be shown) and performs the necessary operations to reveal the specified post and hide the others.

Sidebar Toggle Button

So where the “makespaceforbutton” section is located, there is a <button> element outside the sidebar that toggles its visibility. Key features include:

• Positioning (position:fixed, top:16px, left:16px): Like the sidebar, the button is positioned albeit slightly at 16px at the top left to ensure consistent placement.
• Functionality (onclick="toggleSidebar()"): When you click the button, a JavaScript function toggles the sidebar and adjusts the main content's margin (style.marginLeft).

Informational Popup

<div id="id01"> is a modal overlay designed to display a popup. It uses the following:

• display:none: This initially hides the popup until triggered by JavaScript.
• Styling: Covers the entire page (width:100%; height:100%) and dims the background to a transparent black color (background-color:rgba(0,0,0,0.5)).
• Popup Content: Contains auxiliary <div> elements styled (background-color: coral, padding:16px) for clarity. The close button (technically a multiplication sign, but we can use it as a normal X as well) invokes JavaScript to hide the popup.

CSS Inside <style> Block

The external CSS block includes:

1. #popup-content:
   • Defines the dimensions and animations of the popup.
   • Responsive Design: Adjusts width under smaller screens for mobile users (width:80% for max-width:768px).

Main Content and Blog Posts

The <div id="content"> represents the main content outside the sidebar:

1. <div id="defaultMessage">:

   • Displays introductory text for first-time visitors, including FAQs and descriptions of blog functionality. Once you click on any of the blog posts, it disappears and switches to any selected post.

2. Post Content (<div id="Post1">):

   • Encapsulates individual posts, styled for readability, with sections for headers, metadata, and footer content.
   • Integrates JSON-LD Structured Data (<script type="application/ld+json">): Originally, I did want to integrate some sort of RSS thing, but the problem is that I can't seem to upload files directly to the website's server, and my website/registrar's Cloudflare settings seem to make it difficult to turn web pages into RSS data. So I ended up with JSON-LD, which is actually apparently really only useful for SEO purposes, BUT it can be used as an RSS to a limited but useful extent as well. It took me a while to research and realize that.

JavaScript Functionality

The <script> block governs dynamic behaviors:

1. generateRSS Function:

   • Scans posts for JSON data, builds an RSS-compatible JSON feed (or at least a semblance of it?), and returns it.
   • Utilizes querySelectorAll to locate elements containing data-rss-feed.

2. Event Handlers:

   • togglePosts(): Toggles the visibility of the Demo1 container (posts section).
   • showPost(postId): Hides the default message and displays a specified post by its ID.
   • showAboutPopup() and toggleSidebar(): Control popup and sidebar toggling.

3. Feed Storage: Saves RSS JSON to sessionStorage for quick retrieval.

RSS Feed Copy Button

Finally, the <button> for copying RSS JSON is placed at the bottom-right corner of the viewport. It interacts with the clipboard via navigator.clipboard.writeText().

How Well Did I Do?

This code took me about 3 weeks to get right. I think the JSON thing was the hardest part. Because of how I thought it would be somewhat simple enough to do, and it turned out to be somewhat difficult.

At some point I may add more extra things, so this is just how the code is as of this time in writing.

If you have any feedback of any kind you are welcome to leave it!

The Untilted comic strip is now available for free in both Free and Premium Plans. The Premium Plan will now include not just all comics and commenting, but also:

✅ Exclusive custom art commissions for members only

✅ Exclusive members-only group to help artists improve their skills, provide feedback on their work, and help them develop their unique voice and style

✅ Early access to behind-the-scenes art from my other artistic projects

✅ Guest artist features

...and potentially more.

Additionally, for people who DON'T want to have to register to read the comic for free, I put all my comics on my Buy Me A Coffee page on the Gallery tab, no registration required. There is also a BMAC version of the Premium Plan as well if you'd like.

It took me a while to realize that being vague and mysterious and secretive apparently doesn't work out well in terms of marketing after all, especially for newer artists like myself. So, I decided on a more transparent and inclusive Plan B, as I seem to be getting very little exposure.

I am currently in the process of making some changes to the untilted.lol website. Just a reminder!

@rob@mastodon.art post:

I just had a realization! I think it warrants an exclamation. I will use frequency to differentiate my various web offerings. Continued on blog...

Skip To Recipe

I have TONS of web presences. Sometimes I try out new places based on the ownership structure so then I end up with people following me on Patreon, Ko-fi, Instagram (all of which I hate for their corpo-ness) while I post mostly on Fedi, where I have an entirely new community (my favorite place to be). I have blogs & websites. I used to do newsletters. No matter what they're named they all end up being hodgepodge collections of me. The spaces I create especially for humanissome have Rartsy material, and vice versa. Even the space I made for my fiction project has overlap with my video diaries & daily posts. That's how I am. [1]

I struggle with organization of thoughts & projects. I share my journey. My art is me sharing my life. I have friends, fans, and followers. Even patrons. But... how to strengthen connections and community?

Hear me out but I think frequency is a good way to organize content.

When I start a new whatever the site setup kinda wants me to know what my project is and that effects the structure of how I share it. But I'm figuring things out as I go. There may be some who want to know everything that I'm sharing... but if I take it away from ME for a moment... there is nothing that I follow 100%. How or why would I expect others to sign up for Rob-Firehose? And it's not that I expect anyone to do that. But that's all I'm offering. I am putting myself in eleventy spaces (but not using eleventy; my laptop is too outdated) and hoping that some of what I put out reaches some of the people who want to see it sometimes. It's just me living my life so I'm not gonna criticize that, but as a content sharing method it's inefficient. Now I've figured out how to do it a little more orderly that still feels ok, I think.

I learn as I go. I struggled for years (decades?) with file organization on my computers. Eventually I figured out that I can't always make myself fit into a structure. That's not how I am, it's a constant struggle producing turbulence that burns up energy. I learned how to make an organization that fits me, rather than trying to fit me into what seemed like good organization. I do have a few file categories but the vast majority of my saved files are organized into folders by year and month. Within the designated categories the files are by the same date structure. That order is the closest to the truth of my mind. Whatever I read, bookmarked, saved at a certain time is related & interacting. My projects might contain audio, video, and text files, as well as downloads, in a variety of formats. Organization by date makes the most sense to my work style.

 

Organization by date makes the most sense to my work style. Now I plan to bring frequency control to those who choose to follow what I share.

I have to think a little more before I implement it, but I'm thinking something like:

Rob Seasonally

Updates 2 to 4 times per year

Rob Monthly

Updates once each month

Rob Weekly

Updates once each week

Every post

Each type would have a URL that you can bookmark, an RSS for those noble few using the best internet interface, and the option to receive an email newsletter (I am working on this idea; not for firehose).

Instead of creating new sites, new things for each of the above I will use some of my existing addresses. Their descriptions will change to “monthly” or whatever, and explain about the RSS & email options.

I'm liking this idea.       ※     [1] ^[2] soundtrack for post, I'm a funny dame performed by Eartha Kitt:

[2] even my notes require notes. putting a number in brackets is the format for within the text, above. down here the norm would be to start simply “1. Note text...” but if I do that markdown will format it as a list, indented. there's a way around it but i just like how it looks better in brackets :D

 

For every occasion you got a nice costume To shine and bloom and all attention is with you

But I don't care whatever you wear We met behind the scene every first time we see

We know all our being Alright from every start In a glimpse of the eye One from our heart

There's no witchcraft There's no shrine All is ours and nothing 'mine'

Now and Never Is all the time The joke is on us let it be a first smile every time

We play around out of count and listen to the sound

of night and day curious all along the way

We find our tunes out of the blue boundless feeling and we know

without a doubt free in joy wherever we go

all our striving that we share out of compassion we dare birds bear witness to the sun oh the sun

whispering dawn whispering

Moving on new horizons ahead by intuition and intent

we realize with ease intangible dreams every time again

In stillness we cease and crest there are no words to be left all within a joyful heart

within our shining eye morning arise

all our exploring we share with all our attention we care the golden light is shining on within through out you

whispering dawn whispering

let us be strangers curious to see respectful and wondering no assumptions nor deed

let us remain strangers with a gleam in our eye learning and inspiring open what will be

let us become strangers not pretend that we know keep our dreams and visions let the unknown unfold

let us leave as strangers grateful happenings at all nothing as expected no names to call

let us be strangers complementing one another free and united once and for all

(version nro 2)

They came at night with their torches and weapons, like they always do. Teeth bared, eyes glazed, like they were in heat. Not for sex, but for the hunting of the less-than. Their idea of pleasure, always one-sided.

Nostrils flaring for the scent of fear, intoxicated by it.

Not my fear. Theirs. Fear of the Other. Of change.

Somewhere, faintly, fear of doing the wrong thing, of being found out, shamed.  Of what they see of themselves in me.

I sigh and get dressed, head to my front door and open it. Making sure of standing tall, head held high, like a hawk.

Getting out to meet the mob always robs them of the joy of an easy catch of a scared and cowering prey, so they fall silent.

Staring down the leader I declare: “It is not I who is the a monster!”

Deep down I realize: This I will not survive.

#Microfiction #ShortHorror

Part Two

Wiccan Version

The Wiccan versions of the Witch-bottle which follow are more suitable for the Wiccan view of the world, magick and ethics. They are often intended to capture the negative energies or prevent it from ever arriving and – what's important – prevent it to harm the home and its inhabitants. Many of these Wiccan versions are very much like the basic bottle described above, so it isn't necessary to repeat everything over. However, you can use wine, (apple) vinegar or blessed (salted) water instead or in addition to urine. The nails used may be new, etc.

Many Wiccan Witch-bottles use herbs, with the herbs being chosen according to their magickal qualities. There are sometimes very specific instructions given for the gathering of each herb and other items, including correct phases of the Moon. The herbs and other objects may be put in the bottle the previous day, letting the bottle stand by the witch's bed over the night. In the morning, you can add (morning) urine to the bottle, after which the bottle is closed and sealed utilizing Wiccan rituals. Some instructions state that the bottle will be placed in a cupboard or closet, so you don't necessarily have to carefully hide it.

The following instructions are a basic version of a Wiccan version of the Witch-bottle, using herbs. You can do everything using a longer/more complex or a shorter/simpler route, depending on your own inclinations. You can for example start collecting the necessary items on a given phase of the moon (for example on the day before New Moon) and perform the ritual on the next Dark Moon. Or, you can collect the items when you have time for it and build the bottle at any phase of the moon (with protective spells, you don't always have to wait for the right phase of the moon – you do it when you have to). You can utter a suitable spell with every item added to the bottle, summoning the spirit of the item/accessory and meditate for a while – or you can speak your chosen words after the bottle is filled. You can make the bottle as part of a ritual, or you can construct a ritual especially for this occasion. One reason why I'm being so vague with the instructions is that I'm not Wiccan myself.

Materials

* Bottle or jar, with a tightly closing cap or lid * Sea salt * Crystal or stone, for example turquoise, obsidian or black onyx. * Herbs, for example acasia, aloe, lilies, lime, lotus, agrimony, corn, cayenne and black pepper, dried onion, salvia, frankincense, basil, mint, myrrh, garlic, rosemary, mistletoe, pine needles. * A few nails or needles * Wine, (apple) vinegar or urine * Thread * Black candle for sealing * The usual tools used in the ritual section

Preliminary Preparations

You can choose the herbs and crystals you are going to use according to their special qualities or use some of those I've listed. You can also use a drop or two of an essential oil instead of a herb. You can choose the number of herbs and solid items in general (in this case, essential oil is counted as “solid”) to put in the bottle on numerological grounds either so that the number of all solid items is a specific one, or that you will use a certain number of herbs. Suitable numbers are 7, connected to protection, or 9, connected with the Goddess.

Gather the necessary items. Clean the bottle you are going to use. Wash it with warm soapy water carefully (if you can use a specific soap made for protective purposes, so much the better) and dry it well. You can leave the bottle over night in the light of a full moon to charge it. Choose a place to hide the bottle. For a bottle to be filled as part of a ritual or ritually, it is a good thing to have all the necessary tools at hand, on your alter. You can also construct your ritual and spells and chants beforehand.

The purpose of the crystal (which isn't absolutely necessary, the list is given as an example – including the liquid items) is to use it's magickal qualities, the same goes with the herbs. The salt is there to purify and bless the target of the Witch-bottle (the person(s), home to be protected). The nails and needles ground the negative energy and you can also visualize it being then sent back to its sender, threefold. The thread tangles the negative energy in a knot similar to what you are tangling the thread into and to bend the energies away from the builder of the bottle. You can also visualize the negativity tripping over to the thread. The urine represents the builder of the bottle. When using wine or vinegar you can visualize the negative energies drowning in the liquid, with vinegar acting as a purifying element as well.

The Actual Making of the Bottle

If you're constructing the bottle as part of a ritual, you can perform the ritual opening as usual.

Start filling the bottle with the salt. After the salt, add needles or nails, bent or straight. After this, it's time to add the herbs. The crystals and the thread you've tangled into a “ball” can be added next. If you are adding liquids, that is done after the solid items.

When the bottle is otherwise finished, you can raise energies with a suitable chant (I've seen the traditional “Isis, Astarte, Diana, Hecate, Demeter, Kali, Inanna” recommended for this purpose) and directing it into the bottle, after which you close the bottle and seal it with the wax of the candle.

End your ritual as usual and bury the bottle into a suitable place or otherwise hide it. You can burn incense on the hiding place to seal the spell properly.

Witch-Bottle to Show Off

Witch-bottles that are intended to be left out in plain sight are not usually made to that much protect their makers, but to bring the one who has cast this bottled spell something she or he wants. The usual reasons are the reasons so common with other types of spell as well: the wish the gain more love, material gains, happiness, creativity.

I won't give any specific instructions, only basic principles:

Select the bottle or jar used according to its color, shape or the simple fact that it is pleasing to the eye. Go through the magical qualities of herbs, colors, essential oils, metals, crystals etc and choose the ones you'll use in the bottle according to how well they suit your intended purpose. You won't normally use any liquids (except for a few drops of essential oils) in bottles left in the open, they are “dry bottles”. Aim for a harmonious whole. That means: don't try to squeeze in your bottle every single herb or crystal associated with, for example, wealth. Too much is too much!

Pick a few suitable herbs or oils, one suitable crystal, one suitable color. To represent the color you can add (silk) ribbon to the bottle or tie a ribbon around it, or paint a symbol representing your goals with the chosen color. You can also make a “hat” to cover the lid of the bottle, making it out of black cloth and painting a symbol on it with fabric paint or magic marker, or use the color of your spell as the color of this “hat”. You can use colors as colored sands or salts. Even metals have their own magickal correspondences, so you might want to use metal dust or chips.

If you are following the phases of the moon or other celestial objects in your magick, take them into consideration while constructing the bottle. It is up to the bottle's maker whether to use a formal ritual or not.

As a basic principle, it could be suggested that sands (and metal dust/chips) usually go to the bottom, herbs and oils on the sand and the crystal in with the herbs.

Final Words

You can easily develop a large number of versions of the basic Witch-bottle to suit your (and others') needs and life situations. Even during the time historical Witch-bottles were in use, there were new versions being developed, so why not today?! There is no One True Witch-bottle (even though there probably are people who would like to claim so), only bottles more like the traditional ones and bottles of more modern variety. I have run into all kinds of bottles myself, some being love-raising bottles on the brink of going over the level of good taste and ethics (some actually going overboard) to bottles constructed to bind a given bad person very tightly. The many varieties speaks volumes for how effective this type of spell work can be and how versatile it is.

— [1] Oxoniana, vol. i. p. 232, tells how the bottle got its name: “One of the Fellows of Exeter (College), when Dr Prideaux was rector, sent his servitor, after nine o'clock at night, with a large bottle to fetch some ale from the alehouse. When he was coming home with it under his gown the proctor met him, and asked him what he did out so late, and what he had under his gown? The man answered that his master had sent him to the stationers to borrow Bellarmine, which book he had under his arm; and so he went home. Whence a bottle with a big belly is called a Bellarmine to this day, 1667.”

#Witchcraft #Paganism #Magick

Part One

Witch-bottles are probably quite familiar to many Pagans, at least as a concept. Witch-bottle isn't a poor little Witch in a bottle, or hold something Witches drink in their gatherings. They are more akin to a “bottled spell”. The tradition originates from British folklore, traveling with British immigrants to the Americas, if not further. Many modern Pagans have included Witch-bottles in their collection of spells, widening and diversifying this old tradition – and making it more comparable with their personal ethics.

A Bit on the History of Witch-bottles

The history of Witch-bottles goes back hundreds of years. The origins of this tradition has been dated to the 1500's. They were used most actively for a couple of hundred years. This is the same time when the Witch-hunts were going on. After this period, the tradition slowly waned. The last historical Witch-bottle was found in a cabin built in mid 19th century, in Pershore, Worcestershire (UK).

The actual bottle of a traditional Witch-bottle during the 16th and 17th century was a German stone bottle called “bartmann” or “bellermine” bottle. Similar bottles of stone material were manufactured in Holland and Belgium. The technique wasn't mastered in England before the 1660's and bartmann bottle manufacturing was rare in Britain.

The bottle got its name from a cardinal called Bellarmino only after the Witch-bottle tradition had already begun. These bottles had a round belly and they were decorated with a facial image of a grim looking bearded man and a medallion of stylized floral or natural imagery.

Even though these bottles were being manufactured actively in Germany long before the time of Bellarmino – who was against the Reformation – these bottles were given their familiar name as a satirical comment on the Cardinal. His bearded figure resembled the typical bearded man depicted on these bottles.[1] Later on, the bearded image was taken to represent the Devil, which suited well for Witch-bottles, after all — witches were considered as people allied with the Devil.

Glass bottles were also used, but according to my sources they were never as popular as Witch-bottles as were the bartmann ones.

Old Witch-bottles contained things like bent iron nails, human hair (head hair and pubic hair) and urine. Urine as an important ingredient of a Witch-bottle has been long known in folk traditions, but actual findings with the bottle still containing urine have been rare. However, all of the Witch-bottles found in England which were tested for urine, did prove positive. Other traditional items contained in Witch-bottles include small bones, thorns, needles, pieces of wood and in some cases heart-shaped pieces of cloth.

The bottles were most often found buried under the fireplace. Other sites include under the floor, buried in the ground there, and plastered inside walls. The fireplace is, from a magical point of view, a security risk as it has a straight connection with the open skies above. It was believed that the curse of a Witch or even a Witch herself in a shape-shifted form could get into a house through the fireplace. Another security risk was the doorway, as doors are opened and closed several times throughout the day. In addition to the fireplace, the bottles were often hidden near the doorway.

On the Original Uses

The most active period of Witch-bottle usage and the Witch-hunts don't coincide by accident. The fear of Witches produced ways of protecting oneself against them during times when slightest misfortune was easily interpreted as being caused by a curse put on one or another member of the family. From the point of view of a present day Witch, the original purpose for building a Witch-bottle wasn't that pleasant: they were intended to keep Witches and Witches' curses away. The contents of a Witch-bottle was designed to not only divert an attacking Witch, but also to cause her to suffer the agonies brought on by all the nasty things inside the bottle. To put it simply: to turn the curse back to the curser.

The urine in the bottle symbolizes the target of the curse. The curser and the target of the curse were believed to have a strong connection and the curse was believed to target not only its intended victim, but also the bodily fluids of the target. When the bottle was placed in a way that made it easier for the curse to meet with the urine (in the Witch-bottle) before the actual target, the curse hit the bottle and not its intended victim. This is why the bottles were usually hidden where they were. The importance of pubic hair and hair was similar to that of the urine.

Witch-bottles are very much a part of age-old traditions of sympathetic magic with its intentions of causing pain for the Witch with the contents of the Witch-bottle. According to folk beliefs, the use of Witch-bottles sometimes brought the Witch herself, writhing in agony, knocking on the door – begging for somebody to break the Witch-bottle and promising to reverse the curse.

The Witch-bottle was believed to be active as long as the bottle remained hidden and unbroken. People did go though a lot of trouble in hiding their Witch-bottles. Those buried underneath fireplaces have been found only after the rest of the building has been torn down or otherwise disappeared.

Modern-Witch-Bottles

Very generally speaking, the modern day Witch-bottles are very similar to historical Witch-bottles in their basic structure, even though their intended purpose has changed. The most common purpose for constructing a Witch-bottle today is capturing negative energies targeted at the constructor of the bottle, her family or her home. Even though some bottles are “mirroring” in nature, they aren't normally built to cause agony to the sender of negative energy/caster of curses. Some Witch-bottles are intended to change negative energy into positive one and then release it into the surrounding area. This kind of bottles could be classified as “guard and protect”-bottles.

The basic structure of Witch-bottles can be used for purposes other than protective: for financial gain, for helping with artistic creativity, to call forth positive energy (instead of “just filtering out negative energy”), for improving health, etc.

One could say that the basic principle is the following: practically speaking, a Witch-bottle is a container of some sort, usually a jar or a bottle, which is filled with objects and often also liquids which fill a given magickal purpose. The person making the Witch-bottle, or in other words, the one casting the bottled spell, can charge the objects magickally beforehand and build the bottle to work on this charging until the need of renewing the spell arises. Witch-bottles can also be built to recharge themselves by the energy they 'capture' for as long as the bottle stays unbroken, whether it be years or centuries.

Instead of magickally charging the items, one can build a bottle whose the powers are based on its contents, but cumulatively so, resulting with powers stronger than the sum of its parts. Also this version can be designed to be seasonal or “one time lasts a life time”.

What Do Modern Witch-Bottles Contain?

The typical contents of the basic protective Witch-bottle today is quite similar to that of the traditional one: bent iron nails (some say they are better if old and rusty while others say clean and unused are best), thorns, rusty razor blades, broken glass or pieces of broken mirror (some say breaking a mirror for Witch-bottle use causes bad luck, others claim that breaking a mirror for this particular use will not cause bad luck except for people sending negative energies to the bottle builder), or other sharp and dangerous “nasties”, urine of the bottle's builder, often also menstrual or other blood. One could use semen as the masculine counterpart for menstrual blood. The bottle is often a common tight-lidded glass jar, or a bottle with a rather wide mouth.

Other types of Witch-bottles may contain sand or different colored sands, crystals, stones, knotted threads, herbs, spices, resin, flowers, candles (no, you won't burn them inside the bottle), incense (you won't burn it either), votive candles, salt, vinegar, oil, coins, saw dust, ashes etc etc. Actually, everything used in “normal spells” can be used in this bottled version of a spell, the Witch-bottle.

Additional materials include candles and/or wax to seal the bottle/jar with. The rest of the materials depend on the ritual in question (if any) and the religion of the builder of the bottle.

On the Hiding Place

A Pagan living in their own house may be able to hide the Witch-bottle in the traditional way under the fireplace, under the floor, or in the walls. However, it is more common to bury the bottle in the yard in a place where nobody will accidentally break it while digging in the garden. One such place is behind stones under the stairs. For a Pagan living in a terraced house burying the bottle in the garden should work well – as long as you are careful not to attract too much attention to yourself while burying an odd object (the bottle) during the correct phase of the Moon, at night, with just candle light, wearing suspicious looking ritual garments.

Apartments can be a difficult place to live in when you're trying to find somewhere to hide a Witch-bottle. Or, at least it may seem like that! Digging a hole and burying the bottle in the yard may be not only difficult, but also quite likely not allowed. Nosy kids can dig the bottle up and hurt themselves on the contents. Not to mention that in the right (or wrong, to be more precise) neighborhood could cause lots of trouble for the Pagan attempting to hide a bottle in the yard.

However, the situation is not that impossible! The bottle doesn't need to be situated near the home in order for it to work. If you are constructing a bottle intended to be a personal safety guard, it can be buried in a forest or sunk in a swamp. With a Witch-bottle designed to guard a given home and those living in it, you can use a large flowerpot by the front door or on the windowsill to bury the bottle in to. In this case, the bottle should be small enough to fit in the flowerpot – with the plant!

Another idea I've heard is putting the Witch-bottle into a closet next to the front door, where it could easily do its job as a guardian and protector of the home and its inhabitants. However, this solution might cause some trouble if the same thing that happened to one Pagan happens to you: the Witch-bottle she kept in her closet worked very well – until it one day literally blew up. The bottle was of the very traditional type, so cleaning up after this wasn't that pleasant, as you can well imagine! While refining the idea further, we ended up putting the bottle in a covered bucket filled with soil and then putting the bottle inside the bucket in the closet.

For a Pagan still “in the closet” or living in something like student housing with a room mate these ideas may not be that usable. There's still no need to panic, as Witch-bottles can be made in miniature size, too. One witch working with test tubes in her professional life worked out recycling methods for test tubes as miniature Witch-bottles small enough to fit in the flowerpots on her windowsill. If you want to use test tubes, make sure you can close them tightly. There are also miniature bottles and jars available at various gift shops which can be used as well.

It should be noted that not all Witch-bottles are designed to be hidden away. Some are intended to be left out in the open, for example on the windowsill, on your altar or on your (work) desk.

Some Instructions

The next part contains some instructions for making Witch-bottles. I won't be including any particular instructions for rituals. First, because the exact rituals used depend on the religion of the person crafting the Witch-bottle and rituals aren't even always necessary. One doesn't even have Pagan religious inclinations for constructing a Witch-bottle. One of the persons who has made a Witch-bottle with my instructions is completely unaffiliated religiously, doesn't consider himself a Pagan, and is more or less an Atheist. He is, nevertheless, very happy with the results. Second, planning the ritual (if one decides to have one) can be considered an important part of constructing a Witch-bottle. As important as planning and gathering the objects used. Third, if you are using a pre-made ritual, you can easily end up repeating somebody else's words and copying somebody else's motions, without proper emotions. Finally, modifying things to suit you better is in this context not only allowed, it's recommended!

Basic Bottle for a Modern Witch

This is the tried and tested basic Witch-bottle, suitable also for modern day Pagans. The bottle is intended to be one that protects its maker, often also the maker's home and family, from negative energies. Depending on how the bottle is made and on the maker's Will, the bottle can be one that gathers the negative energies in itself (capturing), one that sends the energies back to where they came from (mirroring) or one that changes negative energy into positive (transforming). I would say, however, that this traditional Witch-bottle isn't the best suited one for the last option.

Materials

• Glass, earthenware or stone bottle or jar, with a tightly closing cap. Size depending on how big you can easily hide. Size doesn't matter that much, so be reasonable.
  • Protective gloves for handling items you'll be putting in the bottle. A Witch-bottle won't help you much if you manage to get a blood poisoning while constructing one.
  • Wax or candles to seal the bottle. Black is a good choice.
  • Another jar for “potty” if you don't have one. Aiming isn't that easy, especially if you're trying to hit something like a Witch-bottle. So, you'll need something to pee into – and of course you'll need your urine.
• All kinds of “nasties”: Nails, rusty and bent (you can bend them yourself, too). Pieces of barbed wire, thorns, burrs, pieces of glass and/or mirror, needles etc.
  • Some things to choose from: Menstrual blood or semen. You can drain menstrual blood from your menstrual pads or tampons. In order to get semen – well, you do know how to get it. Word of advice, though – if you are using sex magick as a part of your Witch-bottle building ritual, do try to remember that you were supposed to collect some of the semen to use in the bottle. It's not that easy to collect it out of your partner, you know. Other blood – get a sterile needle from the pharmacist and remember to buy some band-aids as well. You can also add your pubic or other hair to represent yourself. An egg can also be included.
  • Bandages should be readily available, in the case something happens. A lot of the stuff you're putting into the bottle is sharp.

Preliminary preparations

Gather all the necessary items, your bodily fluids being the very last ones as you don't want to store them even for a day. You can collect other items intended for a Witch-bottle over a long period of time, storing them until you have all the necessary items and enough of them. Items found on the ground suit the purpose well. Cut metal items into smaller pieces if necessary so that they fit into the bottle you've chosen. If you're using a very small bottle, remember that will need only a very very small number of each item or alternatively small items (broken needles, tiny nails etc).

Choose a date to suit your magickal workings best and plan your ritual, if these things are important for you. Waning moon is often considered a suitable time for building a Witch-bottle. The ritual can consist of just the visualization of the bottle's intended use.

You can use the following to help with your visualization:

Your bodily fluids are intended to symbolize yourself, they are part of your essence and are traditionally used in magick. Instead of having the negative energies hitting you, they hit your “representative” in the Witch-bottle, the part of your essence.

For a capturing bottle: The “nasties” inside the bottle are intended to capture the negative energies – the metal captures them, the glass confuses and cuts them, the thorns puncture them and iron (and egg) dissolve them. You can visualize the negative energies drowning in the urine. If you are building a mirroring bottle, visualize the glass and mirror mirroring the negative energy back to its sender or to grounding it to earth. For a transforming bottle you can use colored glass and visualize the negative energy transforming into positive one before continuing on its journey forward to benefit you, your home or the universe.

Choose the place to hide your Witch-bottle before you make it. Be sure you have all the necessary equipment like a shovel. By the time the bottle is finished, it's too late to start pondering “but where will I put this thing?” If you are going to bury the bottle in the ground, choose the place so that people or animals will not dig it up.

The Actual Making of the Bottle

Have all the necessary equipment and items at hand in a place you consider best suitable for the task, at a time most suitable for you. Cast a circle, if you feel one necessary. You can build the bottle and have your ritual at the site of where you will hide it or do everything else in one place and then take the ready bottle elsewhere to be buried.

Fill the bottle with items you've chosen until they form a disgusting mixture. Shake the bottle to mix the items, if necessary. If you are including an egg, don't break it and add it as the last of the solid items. Remember to leave enough room for it as well.

After this, add urine, menstrual blood or semen, or prick your finger with the sterile lancet and add as the very last thing a few drops of your blood. You won't need large amounts, blood and semen are considered potent, so few drops will do.

Close the cap or lid and seal the bottle. You can carve symbols of your choice (for example runes, a sigil), being careful not to break the seal. If this happens, remove the wax and start the sealing process again.

If you are going to go to another place to hide the bottle, clean up after yourself especially if there is any chance that somebody else will get to the place where you were building your bottle before you come back from hiding it! If you did cast a circle before starting, take it down. Remember to ground yourself (if you are creating the bottle at the place where you're hiding it, you can do this afterwards).

Travel to the hiding place and hide your Witch-bottle in a suitable manner. Banishing words suit the situation well and if you don't know how or don't want to use traditional banishing spells or something similar, you can even swear like a drunken sailor! You can bury the bottle upside down, putting more nasties in the hole you buried around the bottle before covering it all up. If you are hiding the bottle somewhere inside your home, hide it the right way up.

#Magick #Witchcraft #Paganism

At some point of the journey there comes a time when you feel like you're ready to cut lose from just reading and talking, proceeding to actually doing something – in this case, to performing rituals. There are plenty of pre-made rituals available in books and on the net, so it's only the question of taking the texts in one hand and starting to ritualize? Well, that is one approach and nobody is saying that it couldn't be a workable and giving one. However, this time the approach is somewhat different – one stating that it's good to not only know how something is done, but also why.

1. Know the Backgrounds

When you're practicing your religiosity and magick alone you are lacking (out of your own initiative or simply due to the lack of a suitable group) people who would be there teaching you the basics hands-on. So, your own initiative is of prime importance. Texts and descriptions of rituals do tell much, but they don't always explain the backgrounds any closer.

To start a ritual project, you can head out to research with the help of various sources the very meanings of a ritual. Why you're supposed to say what is said in the ritual and why you're supposed to do what is said you should do. In every single better constructed ritual the words and gestures mean something and you will get so much more out of the ritual when you are aware of the meanings. Do not settle for knowing the right words – know why you are supposed to say them. Do not (for example) just call on certain deities – find out why you are calling them in this particular ritual. Do not think gestures are just gestures – know what they mean. All this may take time, but it is worth it.

2. Learn the Ritual

You can do a ritual while holding the script in front of your nose, but it won't be that smooth.

You can split the ritual into suitable sized pieces, rehearsing them one by one until you know them by heart. This way you can eliminate the “but… do I really remember what I'm supposed to do?” -factor by the time you move to actually doing the ritual and concentrate on the actual rite. Rehearsing and refining gestures can make a nice evening schedule and going over the texts in your mind can give you something worthwhile to do while you are, say, waiting for the bus to arrive. When the little pieces are going smoothly, you can combine them to larger fragments and finally piece all the fragments together to form a whole.

When you are at that stage, you can go through the whole ritual “without the spirit” – that is, without trying to achieve anything other than rehearsing – as many times as you need.

3. Make It Yours

When you have actually performed the ritual so many times it goes smoothly and gives the results it is supposed to give; it's time to make the ritual yours. In this context, making the ritual yours doesn't mean developing your own versions of the texts and gestures, as writing your own ritual is quite another subject indeed. You could compare this to the world of acting, as rituals could be likened to plays. Psychodramas, one could say. The same play can be performed in a multiple of ways, even if nobody changed a single word in it. Each actor past the stage of mimicking another actor's style brings in his or her own interpretation, making the role alive.

When you're only starting out, you are always more or less a “mimicker” while doing rituals other people have written. With the confidence brought on by doing you can little by little develop into a “virtuoso” of your own religiosity and magick working.

#ritual #magick #paganism