Or Why I Settle For Less

“I'm learning to settle for less,” I said and was admonished that I should say that I am learning to manage my expectations. Some words speak to my gut and some do not. “Renunciation” & “maintaining realistic expectations” are concepts that my mind may be able to embrace. To actually make these difficult changes I need buy-in from my gut. And that's why I invoke Settle For Less as a personal philosophy (and de-growth as a societal one).

Original post below.

Expectation Renunciation

Or Why I Settle For Less

November 16, 2023 @ https://dotart.blog/humanissome/expectation-renunciation

This post dabbles briefly in a couple of topics. I continue to feel uninterested in full writing immersion at this time (midway through National Novel Writing Month). One idea for a post is/was a list:

Now ’til December 21	Highlights looking back
* Cards – business & note * Resurrecting email * This blog * Write an annual message? * Post more paintings online * Social contact	* Cards – business & note * Resurrecting email * This blog * My niece’s wedding in New Orleans * Quitting so many online spaces

I don't like lists because I find their creation to be executive acts that eat into the energy available for total executive function. List making in low energy moments may prevent achievement of the items placed on the list.

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The title of this blog post is also instruction on how to enjoy it. By settling for less we may be able to enjoy life more. Ah, but there you see, I had to add in more, as in the adage "Less Is More." More activates us. I have been spreading my Settle For Less message lately & I can proudly report that it is not liked! I was told that what I mean to say is "adjust expectations." I can tell you that I have fully adjusted to expect others to tell me what I mean! Any self-talk that includes the word "expectations" is never going to be felt as deeply in me as saying to myself: I trust myself to discern what it is that I mean. I do not expect this new mantra to lead me into deprivation, or that I won't "go as far" as I would if I spoke other words to myself. I choose these words with care, specifically because they get my attention and speak to me. Perhaps my settling for less could lead to publishing a book I quite like instead of one that's "world-changing." Mantra is a word I have no business using since I have an incomplete understanding of its meaning and derivation. Similarly, I begin this post with a quote that I felt connection with. I felt that its explanation of Renunciation is in keeping with my Settle For Less ideas. Yet. For me to include this quote is to somewhat endorse the speaker, Lama Thubten Yeshe; as well as bodhidave and starry deer crocodile (Ogmin); and even Buddha, buddhism, and the mstdn social Mastodon server. Everything has an association. Much more than I understand. Here's another: Is attribution even a good thing? Can creations—including words of wisdom—hold up apart from their creators? Does the association with creator attach to their creations forever? I tend to make my own things. Knowing that others are using the term humanism for their own meanings, and not being willing to — never being willing to — learn to follow another, I create my own Human Is Some. Not fully vibing with "Adjusting expectations" or "Renunciation" — and, again, not being willing to follow or learn — I prefer to Settle For Less. I am influenced by others tremendously, of course. I think we all draw from a variety of sources and make our own values. I have grown comfortable in my unique path as my unique path, while not having to impose it on others or be affirmed by others in my ways.