Spacegal Chapter 3
CW #Lewd – lots of swearing, references to sex (but none actually in this chapter, I know, how disappointing)
“Remote Assist Officer Viola Embergale logging on comms. You hear me, Cam?”
“Loud and clear,” Cam ran through the system checks on her dash, vague recollections of the dream she'd had with Geoffrey and his cleaning cloth running through her mind.
“Wazzaaaaaaaaaaaaap, gurrrrl?” Vi growled into the mic; Cam winced at the noise levels.
“Faaark, Vi, you get laid or something?”
“...Dammit. How did you guess? You're ruining my fun!”
Finished with going through the start-up motions, Cam flicked the ship into autopilot and leaned back, kicking her feet up onto the edge of the dash as usual as her vessel cruised slowly out of the space station and then throttled forwards when clear of the station's shield.
“Because you only get that excited when there are men involved. Oh shit -” Cam leaned forwards with concern as a horrific thought crossed her mind. “Tell me it wasn't Jareth...?”
“Aww, why not? He's totally sweet,” Vi crooned, and then let a moment of tormented silence hang between them as Cam struggled to not imagine Jareth and her best pal bumping uglies. “But yes, yes it was Jareth.”
“Holy Tizlel, Vi, why would you even!” Cam flung her arms over her head in despair. “He's gross! Ewwww, eww eww eww! Tell me everything. No! No, I don't want to know. Yes I do! Argh! Fine, tell me. I know you're going to anyway. Ugh this is going to be horrid. Okay, lay it on me.”
“Weeeell, you know you left us at the canteen yesterday?” Cam could hear her friend's voice veritably bubbling with excitement.
“We really hit it off. He's a total charmer, all flashy smiles and gentlemanly manners and stuff.”
Cam winced – of course he was a ‘charmer’, all men like that were.
“We talked for a while,” Vi continued, “And then we just, like, couldn't keep our hands off each other. He invited me back to his room and I thought, you know what? Fuckit. It's been ages since I had a good shag and I don't care if he's only in it to get laid because fuck, I'm only in it to get laid, you know?”
“Hear hear,” Cam applauded her friend. “As you know, I am a staunch proponent of getting laid for the sake of getting laid. So – I know I'm going to regret asking, but gory details?”
“It was good. It wasn't, like, amazeballs good, but it was satisfactory. I think his brain is like, 90% ego , but I can work with that. He's a good listener, at least. Makes it easier, ya know?”
“Uh-huh, uh-huh,” Cam nodded to herself. “This a long-standing arrangement or a one-off?”
“Eh, I think I'll see him again. He's not my soulmate or anything, and when it got down to it we didn't really have that much to talk about, but that's fine – who needs talking when you've got six feet of pure muscle in your bed, amirite?”
“Blerrrgh,” Cam wrinkled her nose. “Do not like. I'm happy for you though!”
The ship's reverse thrusters uttered a sequence of short bursts that slowed the forward momentum of the vessel, and then the starboard-side thruster kicked in a span the ship about towards the wormhole. Cam watched it swing into view with the same fascination as the first time she'd seen it – huge, writhing, and made all the more ominous by the fact that nobody knew what was on the other side of it. Nobody had ever thought to go through and check it out for themselves. Nobody cared.
Cam cared, but she lacked the finances and resources to embark on such a mission and the possibilities that might unfold. So far, she hadn't been able to convince anyone to fund her and an exploratory mission, and so instead she'd taken a job right next to the thing so that when someone eventually did go through, she'd be right there watching.
Although, that wasn't the only reason she'd taken this job. Like many others she'd been tired of looking up at the sky and seeing it swarming with junk, of intra-system passenger flights taking longer and longer because of the pile-up of garbage just floating there in the void. Unlike many others, she'd decided to get actively involved in cleaning it up, even if that did mean just condensing it into bricks and spitting those bricks through a conveniently placed wormhole into Tizlel knows where. They could be polluting the heck out of another planetary system right now. Hell, they could be tossing junk right down onto some poor planet's surface. Their actions could well have caused an extinction event in some distant corner of the universe.
Or, as an alternative that Cam liked to think of if she wanted to get to sleep at night, they were simply relocating their junk to a vast, empty corner of space with nothing else in it. A galactic rubbish dump, if you will.
“Fifty clicks from drop-off point,” Cam read from the console.
“Roger,” Vi replied. “So what did you get up to after you left us yesterday?”
“Oh, uh... Well, I ran into Geoffrey,” She winced knowing that Vi was about to make this into a 'thing'.
“Ooh!” She heard Vi clapping her hands excitedly. “Tell me more! What happened?”
“I went to the canteen and he was already there standing in line. So we just, y'know, said hi and stuff.”
“Right,” Vi tutted. “Come on; you know me better and I know you better. Spill the beans, lady.”
“Gah! Fine. I said hi, we chatted a bit, awkwardly because I don't know why but whatever. Asked him if he'd tried the sausage I always get there, and he hadn't, and – can you believe this? – didn't even know what a sausage was! So I bought one each for us, and one mug of Fiestea each, and for some silly, daft, inane reason I asked him if he wanted to come eat with me at my special spot.”
“Oooh!” Vi chirruped. “And what did he say?”
“He said yes, actually. He knew where I meant, too; said he'd seen me there once. I think I saw him there the day Jareth introduced himself to me. Anyway, it all went to shit after that, so whatever.”
“Oh,” Vi sounded dejected. “How come? What happened?”
“Fucking arsehole started insinuating that he'd had sex with me and was asking how it was.”
“Wait – what? That doesn't sound like Geoffrey.”
“Yeah, well, you think you know someone.”
“No but, really, that doesn't sound like him. Seriously, he's really shy. He wouldn't just come out with something like that. What did he say? Oh – ten clicks from drop-off point, prepare cargo for release.”
“Confirmed, beginning rotation,” Cam disabled auto-pilot and took the ship into a slow spin to line up the cargo pod with the wormhole. “He uh...” She pretended to try to recall the exact words, even though she'd played the whole conversation over in her head a thousand times since then. “He asked me how the phallus was. He said, 'How's the phallus?' and when I clarified that he was in fact asking what I thought he was asking, he said 'yes, the phallus, the one I gave you'. Like, WTF, right?”
“Oh, man... Uh, are you sure he said phallus and not phaelis?”
“You just said the same word twice,” Cam frowned. “Disengaging cargo.”
A solid thunk from the back of the ship signified the un-clamping of the cargo pod.
“No, listen. Phallus – p-h-a-l-l-u-s ; the male genital organ, aka dick, aka schlong, aka happy fun times; versus phaelis, p-h-a-e-l-i-s; an unidentified space creature. I think Geoffrey was asking you about Brat. Cargo disengaged, commence boost.”
Cam's eyes widened. “Oh fuck. What the fuck kind of word is phaelis? Who even knows that shit? Oh fuck.”
“Commence boost, Cam.”
“Right. Uh...” Cam punched the thrusters and the ship propelled forwards. She watched the little radar dot of the cargo pod floating off towards the wormhole. “Done. Heading home for the next lot. Shit, Vi,” She leaned back in her chair and rubbed the heels of her hands into her eye sockets. “I think I fucked up big time. I got really mad at him and he looked so confused and I just swore at him and stalked off in a huff and left him there with his sausage.”
“You arsehole,” Cam could hear that Vi was trying not to giggle. “Yeah, you fucked up. But you know what? Now you get to make up.”
“Urgh,” Cam winced. “There a flower shop on the station? Chocolates? Sports Illustrated?”
“Hey – Cam?”
“Yeah I know dumb idea. I'll just have to suck it up and -”
“No, Cam, look at your radar – do you see that?”
Cam kicked her boots off the console and leaned over the radar. The green blip of the cargo crate had vanished, sucked into the wormhole to whatever lay beyond – but now another blip, much smaller, was moving towards her at a velocity and trajectory that suggested it had just exited the wormhole. Her heart skipped a beat.
“Holy fuck. Did that just get spat OUT of the wormhole? Our side?”
“Looks like it. Scan?”
Camryn tapped a command into the console and ran a preliminary scan on the object that was floating unassumingly towards her ship.
“Small, rectangular. Scanning materials – seems to be a composite of the stuff we send through! Shit this is intense. Pulling up a visual now. Woah! It's a box!”
“A box?” Vi's voice was cautionary. “You sure?”
“Looks like one. Has a seam around the circumference and a clasp on one side and hinges on the other. Scans confirm that it's hollow and has a small object inside.”
“What kind of object?”
“Flat, rectangular, thin. Like... a datapad? I dunno. I'll have to tractor it in and open it up.”
“Shit, Cam, be careful.”
“Yeah, I know. I'll follow protocol. Suiting up now.”
Cam stood from the chair and grabbed the spacesuit from the hook behind her. She'd had a few opportunities to use the suit before – all boring stuff, repair missions that involved spacewalking, usually on the station itself but a few times on her ship during a run when some part or other had given up the ghost. They weren't exactly well funded and pilots were expected, in an unwritten agreement that absolutely did not comply with union standards, to carry out their own maintenance wherever possible.
She tugged on the black costume, secured the gloves and helmet, stepped into the boots, and then pressed the button on her chest that secured the whole thing into an airtight spacesuit.
“Still hear me?” She asked into the headset while leaning over the console to activate the tractor beam.
“Yep. Update me.”
“Suit on and functional, tractor beam engaged. Opening aft door.”
“If it blows up, I love you and I'm telling Geoffrey everything.”
“Shut up.”
A large panel in the back of the ship engaged into motion, lowering outwards on heavy pistons. Cam could see the little box being pulled in towards her by the tractor beam. It looked about a foot wide and half that much long and deep – like a fat briefcase.
“Almost here,” She told Vi, whose silence on the other end was palpable.
When the box was close enough, Cam reached out and took a gentle hold of it, pulling it out of the tractor beam's field and into the ship. She punched the button to close the aft hatch and set the box on the floor.
“Got it. Yep, it's a box with hinges and a clasp. Opening it now.”
“Be careful!!” Vi's voice was at least an octave higher than normal.
“Yes, mom.”
The clasp flipped up easily. Cam took a deep breath of the nice, fresh oxygen that the spacesuit manufactured for her, and then gently lifted the lid.
“Yeah, this is a datapad. Has a single switch and a screen.”
“Are you absolutely certain it's not a bomb?”
“Like, ninety-nine point nine nine nine nine nine nine nine percent,” Cam replied. “Turning it on.”
She pushed the button with a fat gloved finger and the screen lit in a pleasing lavender glow. After a few moments, the screen filled with what she assumed were words.
“There's something written on it, I think. Hang on, scanning it into the ship's computer.”
“What if it's a virus?”
“Cool! Virus from outer space!”
“Er, we're in outer space already.”
“Hush. Okay, ship computer is trying to translate it.”
Cam tugged at the tight fit of the suit while she waited for the computer to do its thing. The databanks on every ship were linked with the station, which in turn was linked to every other station and the main sector hub, which was linked to every planet in the sector and every other sector belonging to the galactic network. Every language of every alien species belonging to the network was in there, and the AI was advanced enough to be able to extrapolate data to try to decipher new languages.
After several agonisingly long minutes, the ship computer alerted her that it had completed its task. Cam sat down in the chair and leaned over the display, reading the words it had provided, and with a frown, reading them again.
“This is weird. Hang on, wiping that file and starting the translation again.”
“What is it?”
“Will tell you in a minute, lemme run it again just to make sure.”
Again she waited, tapping her gloves on the dash and staring out into space, trying not to think about just how exactly she was going to tackle apologising to Geoffrey. She should probably go over there right after her shift, get it done with. That would quite possibly mean another encounter with him in his sleeping clothes, and that thought kicked her anxiety up a level. She sighed and willed the computer to hurry. Presently, it beeped at her again and she read through the contents of the screen.
“It done?” Vi asked.
“Yeah. Same thing as last time. Okay, this is weird as fuck.”
“What? What is it?!”
“It appears to be a recipe for a sausage.”
- * * *
Jareth studied the closeness of his shave in the mirror, inspecting in minute detail that his chin and cheeks were silky-smooth, and then poured some aftershave into the palm of his hand and splashed it onto his cheeks.
“Perfect!” He announced to no-one, and then struck a pose, scrutinising his clothing and hair. He undid just one more button on his shirt so that his chest hairs weren't so much peeking over the top but rather flowing forth in a fountain of sexy manliness, and then declared himself fit for consumption.
The corridor outside his room was bustling. It was a busy time of day; the morning shifts were just getting started and the night shifts were coming off and heading to the food courts for their evening meals. He'd arranged to meet Vi just after her shift and grab dinner with her at Draegan's; it was by far his favourite eatery; not just on the station, but anywhere, in fact. That he'd be joined by the foxy comms chick was just a bonus.
They'd really hit it off that first time they'd met. He'd been on his way to have another crack at the pilot, but he could tell she was a bit stuck up and honestly, her friend had been a much easier catch. Maybe he'd save the pilot for another challenge another day, if he ever got bored of this one. Though considering how energetic she'd been in the sack, he couldn't see himself getting bored for a while.
“Hey there,” He paused to flash a smile at a passing hottie. She replied with a frown and hurried off along the corridor, affording Jareth a lovely view of her ass as she went. Oh well – couldn't win them all. Looked like she was in a janitor uniform too – not exactly a profession he'd call sexy.
He got to the food court and lingered at the edge of Draegan's; a few moments later, Vi emerged from the crowd and wandered over to him wearing the sweetest little blushing grin.
“Hey,” She beamed up at him, that same sparkle in her eyes as the first time they'd met, when he'd ran his fingers up and down her forearm and she'd hooked her foot around his ankle under the cheap metal table.
“Hey sexy,” He leaned down and purred in her ear before giving her a lingering kiss on the cheek. Play it cool, take it slow – he'd tease her a little and she'd get her mouth-to-mouth later on; if she was lucky, maybe more. She looked good – dishevelled from a long shift, with loose strands of hair curling around her cheeks, her sleeves shoved up to her elbows and her shirt wrinkled from hours of sitting at the desk.
Jareth wrapped his arm around her hips and guided her towards the queue. His stomach was growling; it was later than he'd usually eat but dinner with Vi and the possibility of what might happen afterwards was worth waiting for; or hopefully would be, at least.
“Good day?” She asked him. “How are you settling in?”
“Oh, fine,” He smiled down at her. “Got my uniform today. It's a size too small and really brings out my muscles, you know? I should have worn it for you, given you a treat.”
She chuckled. “I'm sure I'll see it at some point. They assigned you your comms partner?”
“Ugh,” His face soured somewhat. “Some dude. I asked for you but apparently you're full.”
“Yeah, my schedule's pretty hectic. Sorry, babe.”
“Can't you drop anyone? How about your friend? I'm sure she won't mind.”
Vi wrinkled her nose. “Cam? I'm not dropping her. She's like, the highlight of my shift. We crack wise. It's good times.”
“Good times? The job's pretty boring,” Jareth shrugged. “Figured it'd be boring whoever you're talking to on the headset. Two Emperor D meals,” He ordered for them both and then waited for her to extract her chip card from her wallet to scan for her half of the food.
“Actually we had a pretty exciting day today,” She followed him as he led her to his chosen table and sat on the chair he pulled out for her.
“Yeah? How come?”
“Well, I'm not sure how much I should be talking about this,” She glanced around them, looking at the other people seated at the tables, and the waiting staff that hovered nearby.
“Aw, come on,” He took her tiny hand in his and played with her fingers. “Why not, is it dangerous?”
“Dangerous? No,” Her cheeks had flushed from his contact with her; good, loosen her up a bit, get her in the mood. “It's just, uh, unusual. I'll check with Cam, alright? If she says it's okay, I'll tell you what we found.”
“You found something?” He perked a brow.
“Oh,” Vi frowned. “Dammit. Probably shouldn't have said that.”
“Like what – something floating around with all the junk?”
“Uh, yeah, something like that. It's nothing big. Might not be anything.”
“If it's nothing, then you can tell me about it,” He held her hand in his and used his free hand to tickle up along her forearm. If he could distract her again, maybe she'd let slip a little more.
Their food arrived, forcing him to release Vi's arm to make room on the tiny table. She left her burger box unopened and headed straight for the fries, while he practically tore open the box and took huge, hungry bites from the juicy burger.
“Nah, I'll check with Cam. I'm sure she'll be fine about me telling you but she's the one who found it so she gets to say. Honestly it's nothing exciting; at this point we've hyped it up so much it'll be underwhelming when you hear about it,” She chuckled.
He was about to respond when he noticed the waiter that had brought their food still lingering at the table.
“We're good,” Jareth waved him away. The man, a tall, lean figure with a close-cropped cut of white-blonde hair and pale blue-grey eyes, paused a moment with his eyes on Vi before offering Jareth the tiniest of smiles and walking away.
“Weirdos,” Jareth shrugged at his burger.
“Cam hates the staff here. Says they stare too much, that they're creepy how they're just there, watching everyone.”
“Maybe he fancied you,” he winked at her. “Doesn't have a chance, though. Not with me around. Right?”
Thank you for reading! If you liked it, let me know at WelshPixie <3